


an amnesiac's gamble.

by redvox



Category: DreamSMP, Minecraft - Fandom, Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Amnesiac Ranboo, Derealization, Dream Team SMP Angst (Video Blogging RPF), DreamSMP - Freeform, Gaslighting, Gen, Manipulation, Ranboo Angst (Video Blogging RPF), Taunting, amnesiac, ranboo and dream have a chat (:, repetitive phrases
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-01
Updated: 2021-02-01
Packaged: 2021-03-18 20:53:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,907
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29124477
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/redvox/pseuds/redvox
Summary: he shifts a foot to the edge, but the voice calls to him from the cell. it echoes throughout the hollowed room, the sound of lava suddenly vanishing from his eardrums. he looks up, and is greeted with the man he has seen over and over in his head."how-""you came back for me," dream starts, clambering to the bars of the cell and waiting for them to rise. there's a maniac's smile crawling across his face. "you came for me, you came for me, you want to save me."--intentional lowercase, tw for manipulation, gaslighting, derealization, and repetitive phrases/roleplay dsmp, non-ship
Comments: 5
Kudos: 77





	an amnesiac's gamble.

**Author's Note:**

> tw for manipulation, gaslighting, derealization and repetitive phrases  
> my take on ranboo 'visiting' dream in prison.  
> (:

what lies in cold nether-bright stone is an abandoned body, house to one man who tore friendships and families apart. limb by limb did he tear through bonds so tight, so tough, with such ease like a blade gliding through a brush of green. his machete in hand, the weapon of such malice, to ruin what others had built for his own personal gain. to pile the trust so high with everyone they would find such hesitance when holding a sword to his head, never able to plung such a long dagger through his skull, to pierce his skull and perch it on their walls. 

what nimble fingers ruined by war, skin tearing with each war he has ever commenced, run through dirty blonde hair that begs to be loved. his eye is green and full of lust, a lust for anger and such violence only a madman could crave. little touch gets him to move slyly, to move with such grace and elegance around their fingers, thinking they have him pinned. then once it is gone, when the touch begins to fade and what trust they have is slowly being reeled back in, he attacks. his face is scarred; a long tear through his left cheek that blends into the curvature of his lips, a short scar along the bridge of his nose, a rip through the right side of his forehead and eye. his right eye is a softened green, blinded by the sudden moment of weakness he spared in the heat of the moment.  _ let them win, just once.  _

his arms are much worse for wear, with muscles that fray at the seams, with scars that litter the underside of his forearms, holes puncturing his biceps. his chest is littered with tiny holes, arrows that have punctured him so far, his pecs littered with minor pink scars. his back is torn in two, his legs are crumbling with every step he takes, his feet are pleading for rest, his boots a confined space for such heavy feet to walk the earth he has no right to be on. and yet he continues on, he moves on, he leads on more than what he has. there is no strength in his body. one wrong move and down he goes, entering a limbo between life and death, ultimately taking the fool's bargain and asking for his soul back. 

the grim reaper is afraid of what man has become, what such madness can push humanity so off the deep end. a man who rivals the devil is vicious and always going to be two steps ahead of his prey. hunting is a sport for him, hunting is a sport he sinks his poisonous teeth into. he loves to see his prey attack one another, his very own venom spitting from their tongues and onto others. the impact of such manipulation, of heavy force, of a mountain as tall as his ego--it gets him to stay awake at night, each and every night, sighing in the pale moonlight as he runs his fingers over the curvature of his axe. the blood that pours from his fingertips runs down cold steel, onto the floor, and he has to stick his finger in his mouth and taste the metal coat his tongue.

that was ranboo was told, when he came into contact with the prison guards. he greeted them with nod, over and over, obedient and calm. as he was told by the voice in his head, the non-real man he was just told of. "don't listen to what he says."

why is he here, why is he standing in the prison? dream is not real. he is a voice. he is in ranboo's head, a fool's lullaby that mocks him each time he tries to reach for slumber. what memory he had lost, dream had replenished. 

_ what a terrible man you are, to betray the president. you deserve to be in prison, _ it beckoned to him each time he opened that damned book. the journal to keep his memories in tact was washed away like the sea takes seashells from the sand. replaced with a smile, something that the man in question had done. but ranboo doesn't remember, he doesn't understand why they know so much about dream if he isn't real. he isn't real at all, he is in ranboo's head, why do they interrogate him?

"do you know the criminal?"

ranboo shakes his head. his lips are sewn shut, the voice beckoning for him to _come_ _to the cell, free me from this hell, always tell them no, never give more than that._

"it is just a visit today, correct?"

ranboo nods his head. his hair loosely falls over his eyes. 

"once i move this bridge, you cannot come back."

ranboo opens his mouth to give a statement of understanding, verbally signing the waiver for him to glide across the lava on a mechanical bridge. but nothing comes out of his mouth, nothing makes a sound, like the man in his head cut his vocal chords. so he chokes out a mumbling of words, a gurgle of noise that would send the prison guards reaching for their weapons. "don't take anything from him."

the lava burns at ranboo's skin. he stares down at his monochrome hands. he curls the fingers on his white right hand, while he reaches for his head with his black left hand. he pulls at the purple-toned skin and winces in pain as the pinch sews pain into his nerves. his red-and-green eyes scan the lava with such care, filling his stomach with dread as he moved closer to the holding cell. he wonders what would happen if he fell, if he would fully burn alive, be freed from the man in his head causing him such torment.

he shifts a foot to the edge, but the voice calls to him from the cell. it echoes throughout the hollowed room, the sound of lava suddenly vanishing from his eardrums. he looks up, and is greeted with the man he has seen over and over in his head. 

"how-"

"you came back for me," dream starts, clambering to the bars of the cell and waiting for them to rise. there's a maniac's smile crawling across his face. "you came for me, you came for me, you  _ want to save me." _

"why am i here?" ranboo looks around him, his skinny, feather-ended tail flicks behind him. "how are you real? how did you escape?"

"you want your memories back, don't you?" the man lunges at ranboo once the bars are lifted. dream extends for ranboo's arms and grabs a hold of them tightly, his calloused fingertips burning ranboo's sensitive skin. "you want to know what you did, what a terrible man you are."

ranboo pulls his arms away. fear runs across his face, but confusion boils in his brain. he swears he finds his dead heart start to beat, to swell in his throat and he only mutters out a choked noise. it sounds akin to fear, something a kitten would mewl in confusion after it's birth. 

dream lets go of ranboo with a shove and watches the boy collapse to the obsidian ground, his knees clattering like pills on tile. "you should be the one in here, ranboo."

"why?" ranboo looks up at dream with glossy eyes. he feels the strong urge to cry, and he's so  _ confused _ of every action he does. his head feels so empty, so cold, the voice has suddenly disappeared from the cages of his skull and materialized in front of him. he's going mad, he's going insane, but he can't remember why or how he got this way. "i didn't do anything."

"you blew up the community house," dream leans down and grabs a firm hold of ranboo's chin, forking it upward to bring their faces close. dream's eyes entice something like fire in ranboo's eyes, and he laughs as water falls from them. "you put me in here to keep yourself away from their eyes, but they'll watch you. once i tell them what you did, how you looted george's house, how you betrayed the president and helped the exiled, how you tried to kill me, stop the destruction of l'manberg--what a fool you are. you ruined so much for me. my friends all hate me, they want me dead, i have a bounty on my head. and yet you have the ass to say you did nothing."

ranboo shakes his head in dream's grasp, trying to pull away. it tightens, squishing the delicate skin into ranboo's teeth. "i'm not done talking to you, telling you what little you have left. where are your friends? tubbo, fundy, niki-"

"i don't know," ranboo chokes out a sob, "please let me go."

dream laughs as ranboo sobs. he shifts passed ranboo's face and moves his lips to the poor boy's ear. "you have nobody but me. you must listen to me. you obeyed me until now, why must you betray me? do you want to be completely alone? phil and techno will eventually leave you when they see the man you are, insane and a criminal. is that what you want to be, alone?"

ranboo shakes his head. his entire body is shaking and shivering. he squeezes his eyes shut and presses his palms into his eyes. dream's arm shifts away along with his face, and ranboo continues to cry into his hands. "no, no, no, no, no. please, they are all i have."

"if you want to play innocent, fine!" dream's tone suddenly changes to anger as he turns away from the sobbing boy. "be that way, and get the hell out of my face! you don't deserve to walk the same earth as them. you took away george, sapnap, bad, skeppy--all of them, away from me! more of them, away from me!" 

ranboo looks at dream with tears flooding his gaze. all he can make out his the worn and dirtied green of his hoodie along with bright, burning emeralds for eyes. "no i-i didn't," he hiccups, "i didn't take anything from you-"

dream strikes the netherite walls with his fist. it echoes in ranboo's empty head. "all you ever do is lie! you lie to everyone, even to me!  _ you're _ the villain here!"

ranboo hugs himself. "no, no, please. i don't remember, i don't know what to believe." dream lets out a huff in aggravation, but it sounds fake and shallow, like he is not truly bitter. but to ranboo, through clouded eyes and empty words, it sounds so genuine and full of spite. "please, please, forgive me. i'm sorry, i-i will believe you, if-if it is in my journal, i will listen."

dream tosses something at ranboo, and it lands right at his knees. he picks it up with shaky hands and presses his wet palms into it. he flips open the torn journal, and reads the date from the end of november.  _ this _ is what he lost,  _ this _ is what he needed. ranboo looks up at dream in gratitude, but it doesn't silence the confusion in his head. why now? why did he get it now? why did dream give it so easily? it isn't true, is it true?

he flips past the cover page and reads. and it says everything dream had taunted him with, shouted at him with. horrified, he drops the book in front of him and pushes it away. he can't believe it, that he did all of that, how his arrival was the cause of such downfall. is it true? is it true? can he trust dream, can he trust him? is it worth the trust, is it safe to trust, can he be safe?

dream walks over to ranboo and kneels next to him. a sickening hand glides over ranboo's arched spine, trying to soothe his nerves, as ranboo crumbles again. he's so fragile, he's so weak to the slightest outburst, but only when it comes from dream. he is confused every day, the stress stacking like building blocks ranboo used to play with as a child. the hand traces every disc in his spine, every vertebrae, counting softly, bleeding into a drone of noise that ranboo tunes out in favor to hear the voice in his head.

_ jump- _

ranboo's head shifts to the lava. dream pulls it back forward.

"-but not yet," dream finishes the voice's thought, as the phrase not only echoes through his head but into his ears. it pierces him and cuts through his veins. ranboo is clay being molded into shapes, only pressed into a ball to be formed anew. "with each memory you gain, is another reason to be here in prison, with me."

ranboo looks at dream, puffy eyebags and streaks of tears floating over his face. he wipes, generously, under his eyes. the water feels cold to his fingers, warm to his face. "stay with you?"

"stay here, with me, come to me," dream coos, pulling his hand away from ranboo's back and standing up to his feet. he walks cautiously into his cell and fires for the bars to rise. "i'm done with you, take your book."

ranboo picks up his book clumsily into his arms. "dream-"

"come to me, ranboo."

ranboo shakes his head. "you mean again, right? i am here, right?" his voice is weak from the sobs he had choked.

"come visit me, please, i'm so alone," dream sighs out, watching the netherite slowly rise from the ground alongside the iron bars of the cell. "i need company."

"i-i am! i'll come back, i'll come back to you!" ranboo drops his journal aside to him and runs to the bars, wrapping his fingers around the steel. "i'll come back, i'll learn everything i used to,  _ please _ , don't say that."

"say what?" dream turns to face ranboo, but there's nothing when he fully faces ranboo. ranboo takes a single step back, fingers still on the bars, and cries in confusion. he looks around him, seeing the obsidian of the cell, the lava beneath him, the empty floor behind him-

his journal. ranboo darts to the ground he had put it on and presses his hands into the rock. he feels nothing. the one thing he needed to keep with him, to keep himself stable and alright, to make sure he is alright. gone, gone, leaving him with nothing. 

nothing. nothing. nothing. nothing. nothing. nothing _nothing_ **_nothing_**

ranboo lets out a blood-curdling scream and he presses the palms of his hands further into his temple. it tears through his body and rips every splitting nerve he had into spindles of fiber. he needs to be rewired, to be fixed and repurposed anew again. what he remembers is now a figment of his mind, and he cries and screams, begging to know something, to find the truth. there is nothing, there will be nothing to know, but he begs and cries and screams. he curls into himself onto the obsidian and cries, yells, pounds his tight fists into the rock and watches the blood begin to pour from the splitting wounds that open at the balls of his hands. he doesn't mind the rock that strikes every muscle, tears every tissue, grazes against every digit of his finger. 

ranboo continues to yell, his voice warbling and melding into part of what he is, part unhuman, part enderman, as purple begins to flood his vision. particles begin to float around him as he screams in agony, in forgiveness, begging to the only god he knows. his body feels hollow, it feels so empty, so carved and gutted, a fisherman's joy to be able to cook and feed his family. he knows so little of what he had, what he wished for, over and over does he stay up and listen to dream mock him. over and over does he cry and beg for something new to learn. every day he makes the best to techno and phil, every night he notes what he should remember, what friends to trust and who to stray away from.

ranboo falls silent once he feels his hands go numb to the pain, once he feels how raw and harsh his voice is. he knows of nothing more to himself, of what pain he had caused. what dream had told him moments before the cell closed is gone, what he can recollect from their visit is that it was never real, he was never in front of him, a hallucination of his mind. dream had tormented him to the point of no return, to make him lose what little grip of reality he had, the amnesia is getting the best of him, he's losing a battle he was always destined to, he can't let go of what he used to remember, even if the words aren't there, the lack of space reminds ranboo of what a life he had. he wants to end it all here, to climb into the vat of lava beneath him, but would it even be there, is it even real? where is the bridge to climb back, where is the prison guard, to come and save him from the breakdown? a saving grace, a mercy rule, something, something, someone, someone, dream, dream, dream  _ dream dream dream  _ **_dream dream dream-_ **

_ Ranboo fell out of the world. _

_ Score: 206128 _

**Author's Note:**

> i hope it came across well enough that it hides the fact i stopped watching the streams LOL im slacking bc of school


End file.
